Throughout my life, my relationship with my father has taken many twists and turns. During my childhood him and I were very close, although as I entered my teenage years things changed drastically. We would constantly argue and could never end a conversation on a positive note. I strongly believe this was due to our religious differences. From my childhood, many memories I have with my father are of going to church services and helping out around the building. As I grew older, I became much more independent and took control of my own beliefs. I chose to no longer attend church (except for major holidays) as I began to question God and Christianity. This upset my father and created an incessant drive in him to make me view otherwise. As an “angsty teenager,” obviously nothing could upset me more than persistent nagging from an authority figure; so our relationship was at a standstill.
Although, as I matured through my teenage years, we were able to alleviate the tension through short discussions about each of our beliefs. Even though we were never able to agree with one another, we were able to understand what each of us held as our personal truth. It was our own beliefs (or truths) that we agreed should be respected. In a perfect world, it wouldn’t have taken us years to come to this conclusion. Nonetheless I am grateful we were able to, as many people who argue about religion don’t.
From the story Sophie’s World, I learned about the philosopher Søren Kierkegaard and his beliefs on “subjective truths.” This idea truly made an impact for me in regards to my relationship with my father. Kierkegaard expressed the importance of truth being “subjective.” “By this he did not mean that it doesn’t matter what we think or believe. He meant that the really important truths are personal. Only these truths are ‘true for me.’” (Gaarder, 376). Although my father and I settled our differences before I was exposed to Kierkegaards beliefs, I strongly believe that if I had learned about subjective truths earlier, our differences would have been settled much sooner. “Because what matters is not whether Christianity is true, but whether it is true for you.” (Gaarder, 377). I also believe understanding the idea of subjective truths is beneficial to society, as it is a much more open way of thinking that allows everyone to carry their own beliefs and accept those of others.
Along with Kierkegaard’s idea of subjective truths, I also learned about his beliefs towards human temperament. In our society, controversies control pop culture and our specific view’s on these controversies directly affect the progression of our society. Basically, our views of what is right and what is wrong play extremely important roles in governing the laws of our culture.
In Sophie’s World, Gaarder expresses Kierkegaard’s view on morals and how we should view what is right and what is wrong. “The important thing is not what you may think is precisely right or wrong. What matters is that you choose to have an opinion at all on what is right or wrong.” (Gaarder, 380). When considering Kierkegaard’s belief, we can break down our own stubborn values and instead be open and supportive of each and everyone’s own belief. This allows a much more accepting environment for it does not deny anybody of their own truths.
This directly relates to my father and I. Rather than hearing one another out and accepting that we each have our own beliefs, we criticized each other and let it affect our relationship. This was an issue that should have been resolved years before it actually was. I truly wish I could have learned about Kierkegaard’s philosophy and ideas of “subjective thinking” and “human temperament” earlier. For it would have opened my eyes to a whole different way of thinking and possibly allowed my father and I to be much more accepting of one another early on. I am extremely grateful for learning the philosophy of Kierkegaard, as I plan to use what I have learned to better myself as an accepting human being, and hopefully in the future as a father of my own “angsty teenager.”
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